The thing that I don't think that civilians who don't, who aren't around, military people who have never served, can't understand what it's like. It's just unless you've done all these crazy things and been an adrenaline junkie to do these crazy things. I'm the world's worst adrenaline junkie. I used to race cars and do all kinds of naughty, weird stuff. And unless you've been that kind of person that just craves that adrenaline all the time, and you're willing to go to some of the worst places on earth to do that. People who don't experience that, who don't understand what it's like. It's kind of hard to explain to them, to be honest.

My baby sister, she's asked me more than once what was it like to get shot at? And I'm like, it's the single most terrifying, exhilarating, exciting and scary thing I've ever done in my entire life. And I'm not articulate enough to be able to put those feelings into enough words to where it makes sense to most people. I'm, I'm not that good.

I've been an idiot that I've, you know, rappelled out of a helicopter before. It's crazy. You're in a helicopter, you get, see this little string of rope and you're about to drop, you know, a couple hundred feet out of it. Normal people don't do that. I had friends who were paratroopers. Normal people don't jump out of an aircraft just because. We like to call ourselves a certain kind of idiot to do it. It takes a certain personality to do those things.

The downside of the being that certain kind of personality is that once you get out of the military and you get on the civilian side, yeah, they teach you how to be a soldier, marine, sailor. How to do your job, even how to kill people and everything else. If that's your job. They don't teach you not how to do that.

It took me all of about three days to out-process when I got out of the military. And there was nothing teaching me how to live in a world and not to be that kind of person. Not to be the  kind of person who has to sit with his back against the wall or to always be looking around or, you know.

I think that's the single biggest mistake that the military did for most of its history, is they don't teach you how to not to be that anymore.